Welcome to My Bumpy Ride.......

Before you all read on, I guess it is best to introduce myself to you and let you know a bit about myself. I am Susan, and first and foremost, I am a mother to a wonderful young man. Though he is grown, he will always be that three year old little boy, that asked all those questions and expected answers to them all. Though I will tell you much about myself in this blog there is no one or nothing that is as important to me as him, even if I don't discuss him much, because he kina likes to remain private.

For years I was actively trying to find myself, but that was a big waste of time, since by doing so I was not living. All my life I have always known that I was "different", but was unable to know why that was. I first thought that perhaps it was because I was adopted, but that was not the case. Turns out, I am bipolar and pretty much have been all my life. This was explained to me about nine years ago when I had a major melt down. I tend to be more on the depressive side, but have on occasion been quite manic. My last episode was early thru mid 2008, with full blown depression. For five months, I bearly left my house, let alone my bed. Why am I telling you this? I just want it out in the open and let you understand that I discuss my illness from time to time.

Present day, I am currently a full time student, studying social work. At the end of 2011 I was approached by a mentor of mine, who mentioned a new program that was going to launch here in Rhode Island. This new program called the Peer Wellness Coaching, was something that I had always wished would become a reality and to add even more excitement was the fact that this mentor was inviting me to train for a position as one of the Peer Wellness Coaches.

So currently (spring 2012) I am part of the three phases of training and should be employed by the fall of 2012. What is even more excellent about this program is that they are aware of my education goals and are willing to work with me on maintaining those goals.

Also you might hear me mention NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness), because I am actively involved with them. I am a facilitator and state trainer for the NAMI Connection groups (peer run support group) here in Rhode Island, and I also help teach high school and college students about mental illness through NAMI RI's Inside Mental Illness program.

So with all that being said...I hope you read on to my daily activities and thoughts and such.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Alphabe-Thursday – New

Alphabe-Thursday through Jenny Matlock’s blog.  Today’s letter is “N.” So here goes…

Today I am going to talk about the word “NEW” and how it pertains to me right now.  The reason for this is because for me there is so much new going on for me and well that is why I decided to choose this “N” word.

First, I started my new job this week.  I like it so far, though my new manager is not really that receptive to me or my job being in her office.  At least that is the vibe I am getting and I really hope I am off on this. 

I guess for those of you, who are not regulars to my blog, I should explain my new job.  I am a Mental Health Peer Specialist/Wellness Coach (Links to Descriptions connected to titles in purple).  I am a peer, because I have mental illness, more to the point; Bipolar, Anxiety, and PTSD.  

Anyways, this is something brand new here in Rhode Island and some of the other mental health workers are not too excited about it, and the vibe I am getting from her is that I am more in the way and something new she has to add to her already busy schedule.  I hope I am wrong about her. 

Because I am new at this mental health center, there is a lot of training that I have to do, so most of my time for the first month will be sitting in front of my new desk taking the courses online.

Today I actually got a chance of going out on the field and also sitting with peer at the office.  For the most part I am shadowing the Social Workers to get acquainted with how things are working right now.  This is a great experience for me, not only because of my new job, but because I am also currently in school for Social Work: which now brings me to the next “new”.

I have a week and a half before I start my new semester at school.  Now I have been doing this for a little while now and honestly I don’t know why each new semester brings on anxiety for me, but it does; and I am really starting to feel the stressors of all these new things. 

It is funny, last spring I took off the semester because of my parent’s illnesses and did that because I didn’t want to be overly stressed out.  I took one less class this semester for the same reason and yet it seems that for each thing I take away, something new replaces it. 

Well anyway, that is why I decided on “NEW” for the “N” word today.  And this picture at the top really represents how I am feeling, but I know, once I get into the grove of things I will be alright.  TTFN.


  1. Good luck with your new job. Hopefully your supervisor will warm up to you and you will have opportunities to learn lots of "new" things in the position.

    BTW, I didn't realize until this post that you live in RI...we lived in the Newport area for about 7 years up until early 2004.

  2. Sometimes, when a new person comes into a work environment, especially one with a new job title, those already on the job are nervous because they are not really sure how this is going to change their routine. As time goes on, hopefully your supervisor will realize that you can be an excellent resource when it comes to dealing with clients. Give her the benefit of the doubt and see if things improve after a few months. I think you should be very proud of yourself. You care working at a new position, taking college courses towards your degree - I guess you are a little be nervous. New job,new classes! You are doing great! I enjoy visiting your blog each week to read about your adventures!

  3. It can be really challenging starting something NEW. Be it a new school semester, even if it happens year after year or a new job. Which presents a totally new environment for you, but also you are new for the 'established' environment. Give it some time, be open, be friendly and over time you and the new environment - hopefully - will become one.
    Best of luck with all your NEWS! :)

  4. Good Luik with THE New job, Great. N word. I loved reading your life's story and I am so glad I did. I am your newest follower.

  5. good luck with the job! i too just started in a new work environment, and i know how stressful it is!



  6. Let your love for the work show everyone just what a asset you are to the job. You will do great! And when times get a little rough, be like a duck in water and just let the negative be like water and let it roll off your back!~Ames

  7. Your "new" are fantastic news! Good luck with the job, and just be gentle to yourself.

  8. Kudos to you for not giving up! Best wishes for the new job. I'm sure they will love you in no time! Great "N" post! I look forward to hearing more about your journey!

  9. I dreamed last night that I started a new job!!! No kidding!! I guess moving to a new town 2100 miles from the old one is kind of like starting a new job.

  10. Lots on your plate but sounds like you have a great attitude about it. I love that you're taking a weakness you have and turning it into a strength to help others! Wishing you the best with all this newness!

  11. Good luck in all your new endeavors!

  12. Change can be so exhausting!

    This new endeavor sounds exciting and challenging.

    I wish you luck with the newness...

    And thank you for linking to Alphabe-Thursday's letter "N".