Welcome to My Bumpy Ride.......

Before you all read on, I guess it is best to introduce myself to you and let you know a bit about myself. I am Susan, and first and foremost, I am a mother to a wonderful young man. Though he is grown, he will always be that three year old little boy, that asked all those questions and expected answers to them all. Though I will tell you much about myself in this blog there is no one or nothing that is as important to me as him, even if I don't discuss him much, because he kina likes to remain private.

For years I was actively trying to find myself, but that was a big waste of time, since by doing so I was not living. All my life I have always known that I was "different", but was unable to know why that was. I first thought that perhaps it was because I was adopted, but that was not the case. Turns out, I am bipolar and pretty much have been all my life. This was explained to me about nine years ago when I had a major melt down. I tend to be more on the depressive side, but have on occasion been quite manic. My last episode was early thru mid 2008, with full blown depression. For five months, I bearly left my house, let alone my bed. Why am I telling you this? I just want it out in the open and let you understand that I discuss my illness from time to time.

Present day, I am currently a full time student, studying social work. At the end of 2011 I was approached by a mentor of mine, who mentioned a new program that was going to launch here in Rhode Island. This new program called the Peer Wellness Coaching, was something that I had always wished would become a reality and to add even more excitement was the fact that this mentor was inviting me to train for a position as one of the Peer Wellness Coaches.

So currently (spring 2012) I am part of the three phases of training and should be employed by the fall of 2012. What is even more excellent about this program is that they are aware of my education goals and are willing to work with me on maintaining those goals.

Also you might hear me mention NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness), because I am actively involved with them. I am a facilitator and state trainer for the NAMI Connection groups (peer run support group) here in Rhode Island, and I also help teach high school and college students about mental illness through NAMI RI's Inside Mental Illness program.

So with all that being said...I hope you read on to my daily activities and thoughts and such.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Entry for November 4, 2010 Schedule Switch a Roo

Today dragged for me today.  I even was getting sleepy in my Western Civ class and that never happens to me.  Good thing about that class is there is no homework at all next week.  We will only be meeting the one day and that is it.  The school is closed on Thursday which would mean that we would miss both English and Western Civ but they are making Thursday be Wednesday but the Professor from Western Civ won’t be able to make the class but the English instructor wants class that day so rather than having two days off next week I have one and a half.  Oh well.  Also because of the schedule change for the one day, I have to cancel the NAMI Connection group I do on Wednesdays. 

Ok, so here it is for today….I decided to quit smoking.  I know I know I have tried before.  Did pretty well for a while and all but failed in the end.  Well this time is different (don’t you hate when people say that). Different as in I won’t have Denny to look to for cash when I need it.  So again the government has chosen something for me because I don’t know better for myself.  They conveniently made the price of smokes so high (with all the taxes they have added to it) that I can’t afford them.  But that is ok, at least now the insurance companies feel better since I won’t be wasting them large sums of money on unnecessary equipment due to my smoking problem.  I should feel so grateful that everyone is so concerned about me that they feel the need to control me but with me not realizing it.  It is the whole enforcing the seatbelt laws all over again.  Don’t let me get started.

How do you deal with a guy who creeps you kina out but you know you have to work with them.  You wonder if they have dead people decaying in their basement.  Maybe that is a bit extreme but there is this guy that I have to work with from time to time and well he kina creeps me out.  I guess he does, because you never know if he is going to snap.  He always looks like he is on the verge of just freaking out.  You feel like you have to watch everything you say to him.  It is just an awkward situation.

Oh ok so my friend Ami who had the surgery.  She is home and doing really well.  She gave me permission to share with you all that she got the gastric bypass surgery.  She was way nervous before the surgery and was trying to figure out if she was going to be doing the right thing.  Now that the surgery itself is done and she has mild pain, I think she feels like she made the right choice.  Hugs out to Ami.

This picture is brought to you because I was thinking of Ami and since she is ten years younger than me she had to quite young when this doll hit the market with a bang in 1984.  If you are not sure on the doll and where she came from you are either quite young or from another country.  I introduce to you, the Cabbage Patch Kid….. TTFN

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